Articles

People Online Have Been Asking For A Reality Show Where Flat Earthers Look For Earth’s Edge

By Psquared - August 08, 2019
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If you have anywhere between an hour to 95 days to kill, go ahead and Google “conspiracy theories” and dive into that bottomless rabbit hole. Before you do, you may want to tie a rope around your waist, otherwise you may never be able to pull yourself out of and find your way back from that deep, dark pit. Nobody fully believes everything that the government tells them, and it’s healthy to have a bit of skepticism and willingness to question what you’re told.

However, things quickly go off the rails, and you’d be astonished to see what people believe. Aliens murdered JFK? Sounds reasonable. Bigfoot faked the moon landing? Seems more plausible than us actually landing on the moon, doesn’t it? While conspiracy theories can make your head hurt, they are undoubtedly entertaining the more outlandish they get. It’d make for a perfect reality show, which is exactly what some folks online have suggested…

Conspiracy Theories

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The Earth was formed after an unfathomably large nuclear explosion billions of years ago scattered matter across the entire universe.

It formed and cooled in such a meticulously perfect way that life was able to develop on this wet rock circling a massive flaming orb in a vacuum of infinite nothingness.

That sounds pretty amazing, doesn’t it? It is, but for some reason, it isn’t enough for some people, so they have to develop paranoid theories of how things really went down.

The Earth

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There have been some truly outrageous conspiracy theories that have developed over the past hundred or so years.

But none have been more enduring and unfortunately more popular than one involving our beautiful little blue, round planet.

If that last statement seems controversial to you, you may want to turn away now, because spoiler: we won’t be in agreement. You see, this image here is enough to send lots of folks into a tizzy and make them yell, “fake!”

Flat Earth

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Yes, in this day and age, with all the knowledge you could ever want fitting in a phone you can hold in the palm of your hand, there are thousands out there that think the world is flat.

We’ve been told since we were little that Columbus proved the world was round all the way back in 1492.

Well, it turns out that’s another thing we were lied to about involving Columbus, because we’ve actually known the Earth’s shape  for well over 2,000 years.

Evidence

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The fact that we’ve been given incorrect and sugarcoated versions of history in school is sadly evidence for flat earthers.

They believe if we were lied to about that, then what else have we been lied to, huh?

After all, why wouldn’t we believe our own two eyes? Have you ever driven through Texas or Oklahoma? Hours and hours of nothing but flat land. We don’t see any curves, so naturally, the Earth must be flat. It’s the only explanation.

Actually...

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However, the Earth only seems flat because from our perspective on the ground we can’t view the curvature.

But when you get high enough, you can absolutely see it. Here’s a picture from a weather balloon showing absolute proof the Earth has a curve and is actually round.

But is this good enough for flat earthers? Of course not. They’ll be quick to tell you it’s fake. Their society is in an echo chamber where they constantly tell each other they’re right and everyone else is wrong.

Flat Earth Society

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Oh and when we say they have a society, we weren’t joking. They actually have their very own website.

The website states that, “The Flat Earth Society mans the guns against oppression of thought and the Globularist lies of a new age.

Standing with reason we offer a home to those wayward thinkers that march bravely on with REASON and TRUTH in recognizing the TRUE shape of the Earth – Flat. Come join us in our forums and get started learning about the greatest lie ever told.”

Not New

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By the way, this society is nothing new. Here’s a map from 1893 that posits the world is actually flat.

Mind you, even back then, explorers and ships of European powers had already been circumnavigating the planet for hundreds of years.

According to their website, “The modern age of the Flat Earth Society dates back to the early 1800s, when it was founded by Samuel Birley Rowbotham, an English inventor. Samuel Rowbotham’s Flat Earth views were based largely on literal interpretation of Bible passages.”

Serious Business

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By the way, we’re only scratching the surface of this flat Earth stuff (since they don’t believe in the Earth having a deep core, of course).

We weren’t lying when we told you about being careful when going on these internet conspiracy deep dives.

And in case you’re thinking that these are just committed trolls, that’s not the case. On their FAQ section, they have what must be their most asked question, “Are you serious?” Their answer? A simple, “Yes.”

Idea

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It’s kind of maddening to think about how intentionally dense some people choose to be.

So many people have advanced science and the human race itself to gain knowledge of our world and how it works, and these people are claiming it’s all some form of lies and oppression.

Well, if you can’t beat them, then you might as well join them… each and every week in an entertaining way, as this idea that’s been gaining popularity suggests we do.

Reality Show

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The idea has been posed that there should be a reality show where we could watch flat earthers attempt to find the edge of the world.

After all, if our planet is flat, then there must be an end to it, right?

Wouldn’t you love to watch them all slowly get more and more frustrated when they can’t find it, yet still refuse to admit they were wrong and continue forever in their useless hunt to discover something that isn’t there?

The Ratings

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Presidential debates? A lot of people watch those. The Super Bowl? We hear its ratings are okay.

But this show? Every single person on the (saying it loud enough for all the conspiracy theorists in the back to hear) ROUND planet would watch each and every week.

Heck, this could be a Truman Show style 24/7 channel, and society would collapse because we’d all be too busy following the escapades of these folks as their hunt continues.

Never Not Watching

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Heck, you could have a show of these flat earthers explaining their theories to you and that alone would be endlessly entertaining.

Here’s an approximation of what they think the Earth looks like from space. However, they think we’ve never been to space.

They think the edges of our world are surrounded by a giant ice wall, and that NASA is secretly securing it. You mean to tell us you wouldn’t watch a show filled with people who believe this and are trying to find it?

The Rules

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This Reddit user laid out a pretty genius set of rules for each of the contestants to follow.

They each get half a million dollars to spend on whatever supplies they need and are given six months as a time limit.

At the end of they six months, if (sorry… when) they don’t find the edge of the flat Earth, they have to return all the money. Yes, that’s a lot of money, but with the ratings and what they can charge advertisers, whatever network picks this idea up will be making a million times their investment back.

Is It Happening?

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So, has any network taken the brave step to finance this show? Sadly… no, and they likely never will.

First of all, it’s kind of cruel to put people on a quest you know is impossible (no matter how fun it would be to watch).

Second, we reckon there would be tons of lawsuits if you sent a bunch of nut jobs sailing out into the open sea by themselves looking for the end of the world (no matter how fun it would be to watch).

Better Theory

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So sadly, our entertainment value from flat earthers is going to be limited to deep dives on their theories and laughing at their silly beliefs.

And laughter is the way to handle them if you ever meet one in real life.

Heck, if you want to have some real fun, try and out-crazy them. Tell them thinking the Earth is flat is absurd… because it’s obviously a donut. Look, we even have a picture to prove it. Open your eyes, sheeple.