For those of you who learned English as a second language or are currently trying to learn our confusing AF language, serious props to you. English is so hard, and even native English speakers don't understand why "bomb" isn't pronounced "boom."

Let me make this clearer for you:

"A little old green lovely rectangular French whittling silver knife" sounds so, so wrong. 

But so does "A rectangular French little lovely old silver whittling knife." 

I don't think this is something we learned in school, but it's something we all just know. 

When you really take a good, hard look at the English language, you'll feel like an idiot for even being fluent in it. The fact that "It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though" is an actual sentence is thoroughly ridiculous.

So I think the lesson here is that we should ditch "goodbye" and go back to our roots. It's time we brought back "God be with ye," because it's a pretty badass way to say bye. Try it the next time you're on the phone with your parents and just see how it goes down.

Why is it that rhyming words never look like they should rhyme? Like "this" and "ludicrous." Or "boys" and "noise." Or "mustard" and "flustered." 

Even the very first letter of the alphabet can give you a bit of a headache when you really think about it. "A" makes so many different sounds. The "A" in "track" is completely different from the "A" in "bagel."

This one should be pretty easy to fix. As a collective English-speaking society, we should just agree to drop the "ueue." Instead, we'll just type things like, "How long was the q?" Or "Do we need to q before the concert?"

That's really just for the Brits, though. Americans get stressed out about the weird word "queue" and instead just say "line."

As with most things, the rest of the world is on the same page about something and then the Anglophones mess everything up. Of course we would be the black sheep and call it a pineapple, because English speakers are skilled at making things harder than they need to be.  

Sure, "fish" is the standard way to spell it, but why not get creative and spell it "ghoti"? Or "pheti"?

English is weird. 

... And almost EVERY OTHER LETTER. This is one of the dumbest "grammar tricks" in the book, because there are so many English words that break this rule.

If you really want to be frustrated with English, be sure to read every word of this post. It'll leave you a bit flummoxed, though. Just warning you. 

The reason we have so many inconsistencies in the English language is because we've taken words from all the other languages in the world. We're word robbers. 

Among other things we have robbed. You know...like countries.

Once again, if you're trying to learn our weird, complicated language, we applaud you. We can't tell you why it is the way it is, but hopefully we can all struggle through it together. 

Dang, English language, sorry for ragging on you so hard before. Sometimes you can be cool. Like right here. Or there. Wait, where?