Sarcasm: Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped. - Elbert Hubbard - Sarcastic Quotes
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Groucho Marx Sarcastic Quotes

No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.

How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.

A man is as young as the woman he feels.

A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five.

Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

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Sarcastic Haikus

Once in a while I'll get a sarcastic haiku from visitors. They are all finely crafted and can be from a haiku master for all I know. Some of them are so sarcastic that I'm not even sure if they are actually sarcastic or if my mind is just playing tricks on me. Regardless, without any further ado, here are the sarcastic haikus

Things that Peeve My Pet

It makes no sense to say "I could care less"! That statement means that it is possible for you to care less, meaning that you at least care a little. What you really mean to say is, "I couldn't care less". I'm sure it is crystal clear to you now, but you could care less about what I have to say.

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