SarcasmDeriving from a Greek word meaning “to strip off the flesh,” sarcasm is caustic, cutting humor in the form of ironic praise, or speaking oppositely in order to wound.Sarcasm |
IronyComic irony is speaking with a veiled meaning or an intended meaning that is opposite to or different from your words, aka dry humor. Sarcasm is a form of comic irony.Irony |
SatireDescribed by literary theorist Northrop Frye as “militant irony,” satire is irony writ large, social criticism that may or may not use humor to make its point.Satire |
BanterA playfully clever or teasing conversation featuring spontaneous and usually rapid joking. Unlike sarcasm, banter is typically friendly and good humored.Banter |
CynicismThe Cynics, named for the Greek word for dog, were philosophers advocating virtue and self-sufficiency above all. Cynicism later came to mean jaded or scornfully negative.Cynicism |
“Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you any worse advice.”
“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
“They worship the ground that he walks away from.”
“I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”
“That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too.”
“I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.”
“What have you been reading, the Gospel According to St. Bastard?”
“Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.”
“A penny saved is a penny you didn't put in the 'Take a penny, leave a penny' tray, you cheap bastard!”
“Absence makes the heart want to fondle other people.”
“If you don't read the newspaper, you are uninformed; if you do read the newspaper, you are misinformed.”
“To err is human. To forgive for no good reason is plain stupid.”
“It's never too late to go wrong.”
“I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't.”
“Everyone knows best; even though everyone knows very little.”
“The problem with common sense is that most people are morons.”
“If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.”
“Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!”
“Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.”
“100,000 sperm and you were the fastest?”
“For your information, I would like to ask a question.”
“The consumer isn't a moron; she is your wife.”
Once in a while I'll get a sarcastic haiku from visitors. They are all finely crafted and can be from a haiku master for all I know. Some of them are so sarcastic that I'm not even sure if they are actually sarcastic or if my mind is just playing tricks on me. Regardless, without any further ado, here are the sarcastic haikus
It makes no sense to say "I could care less"! That statement means that it is possible for you to care less, meaning that you at least care a little. What you really mean to say is, "I couldn't care less". I'm sure it is crystal clear to you now, but you could care less about what I have to say.