“When ideas fail, words come in very handy.”Goethe
“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”Drew Carey
“Stay with me; I want to be alone”Joey Adams
“A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.”Steven Wright
“Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.”Kurt Vonnegut
“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.”Emo Philips
“If at first you don't succeed, try something easier.”Sarcasm Society
“He never slows down to think; it's too painful to spend times with his own thoughts.”Sarcasm Society
“It's never too late to go wrong.”Sarcasm Society
“The problem with common sense is that most people are morons.”Sarcasm Society
“One of the lessons of history is that Nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say.”Will Durant
“It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor”John Cleese
“Personal experience makes a believer out of anyone; that explains the hordes of evolution deniers.”Sarcasm Society
“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”Drew Carey
“Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you any worse advice.”Unknown
