This is one clever hubby. Please tell me you get the reference. If you don’t, this is from Ghostbusters 2. Vigo the Carpathian was trapped in the painting above, and he tried to possess Dana Barrett’s (Sigourney Weaver) baby.
And if that doesn't get you to realize that Ghostbusters 2 is the superior movie, maybe this video will convince you.
Some people say the anal canal is a wormhole to another dimension and galaxies far, far, away. No, I’m pretty sure no one said that. But, ass-teroids are a good pun, because hemorrhoids are like large, uncomfortable, fiery stones entering my rectal orbit.
I can see how someone can be confused into thinking that this drain is a urinal. A lot of toilets around the world are just holes in the ground. Thankfully, they’re not holes in the wall. That would be a lot messier.
This person has learned many a lesson from watching those terrifying spider smash videos on YouTube. You know which one I’m talking about? The one where a wolf spider is hit with a broom and thousands of baby spiders come crawling out of her? Yeah, it’s a nightmare.
“And on next week’s episode of TLC’s My 600 Pound Life, Michelangelo says that he’d been eating pizza every day of his life for the past 40 years. He says his environment spurred his bad eating habits which led to his current morbid obesity.”
“Yeah, I grew up in a sewer. I never really had a dad; just this scraggly old rat who hung out in the sewer with us. Everyone thought I was eating pizza cause it was cool, but really I'd binge eat because of my crippling depression.”
I would literally rather spend a night in jail fearful for my own life than have to sit through 24 hours of Sarah McLachlan’s ASPCA commercials. There would be far more crying involved in the latter than the former. If I have to see one more kitten with a twisted paw or a trembling dog in a dirty cage, I’m going to claw my eyes out.
The one on the lower-right corner looks the most promising. But, I’m pretty sure he isn’t on his knees. Actually, I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have knees. Really, this girl should have asked James Fridman for some Photoshop help.
It’s a delicate balance. You can usually get away with a few bites before a noticeable dent. But before you realize it, you’ve eaten 80 percent of the leftovers. No amount of fluffing is going to get that back. So you just throw the carton on the floor and pretend like the whole thing just fell out of the fridge when you opened the door.