To some, the word “fart” has become a vulgar word. But why? The word “fart” is derived from the Old English word "farten," which means "to break wind". So, stop saying toot, poof or that you made a tooshie burp and just go for the real word. Fart is not a dirty word!
Foods that make you fart the most are broccoli, cauliflower, kale, eggs, red meat, dairy products, garlic and foods high in yeast. Beans are also notorious for making you toot, but according to science, they don’t tend to smell as bad. I beg to differ.
Termites are the biggest farters on the planet. A female Southern Pine Beetle uses her farts to attract her mates. Herrings also communicate underwater by farting and manatees use their farts to help them swim. I wish this worked for humans.
People who fart for a living are called "flatulists”. Mr. Methaneis a performer who bills himself as the world’s top flatulist, or professional farter. He can fart well-known pieces of music and even has his own show. I’m sure his mother is so proud!
It is scientifically proven that one becomes used to their own fart smell and therefore, our own farts never smell as bad to us as smelling someone else's farts. Or if you are like me, your farts smell like roses. Also, I’d love to see how these scientists conducted this experiment!
Have you ever seen your dog smell it’s own fart? Dogs love their own farts and their owners farts. They love any fart really. This is part of the reason why their noses are always sniffing your butt. They are just waiting patiently for one to slip out!
Research shows that sniffing small amounts of hydrogen sulphide can reverse mitochondrial damage. This can help prevent strokes, dementia, cancer and heart attacks. So, get in line and inhale my farts if you want to live a long and healthy life.
Did you know that women’s farts smell worse than men’s farts? This is because women are better than men and also because they have higher hydrogen sulphide content in their bodies. Whose farts smell worse? Girls! Whose farts smell worse? Girls!
Holding in a fart can be very bad for you. It can cause headaches, hemorrhoids or even a distended bowel (Don’t google this). If you are holding them in, they will most likely slip out in your sleep anyway so you may as well let them rip.